Loud and Queer

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“Grandson of a Preacher Man,” by journalist Jonathan Miles in Details (February, 2012) is about Randy Roberts Potts, queer grandson of the late super-evangelist Oral Roberts. The expose reveals startling revelations and endearing moments.

Miles points out: “Randy Roberts Potts likes to say he grew up 50 feet and a million miles away from firebrand televangelist Oral Roberts.  Now openly gay and a pariah to his family, the 37-year-old is on a mission of his own, to undo his grandfather’s legacy by preaching in churches and touring the Bible belt with his new performance piece, ‘The Gay Agenda.‘”

Next month, Potts will premiere what he describes as “the willfully unentertaining show on the road in his native state in Oklahoma City. His itinerary includes midsize red-state cities, like Jackson, Mississippi, Omaha, Nebraska, and Birmingham, Alabama with the intention of reaching populations to “show a neutral, domestic side of gay couple hood . . . that’s identical to straight life.”

Part of Potts’ campaign is to break the stereo-typing of gay life centered on sex, drugs and circuit parties.  His performance piece of a gay couple sharing their lives together is a “visual that people haven’t ever really seen in conservatives towns.”

Potts realized his sexuality at the age of seven. “I was talking to my mom and made some comment to the effect that Strawberry Shortcake (the cartoon character) was really gay. She immediately took it as a teaching moment. Gay, she said, is when two men have sex with one another, and god hates it so much that he burned whole cities to the ground because of it.”

Growing up being more attracted to Bo & Luke over Daisy on “The Dukes of Hazard” confirmed that Potts was attracted to men. But having the fear of God instilled in him by his family’s teachings led him to suppress his homosexuality. Potts even married a woman and had three children, living as a deeply-closeted married man.

Potts broke at 27, finally admitting that he was gay. His admission got him a bitter divorce, and a harsh separation from his parents and family. “I felt ostracized in a way I’d never felt,” he admits.

Oddly, he didn’t have to stand alone for too long.  Brother Stephen was later outed by their own father (a minister) while serving in the Air Force. Duel gay progeny didn’t mean any quicker healing.  When their grandmother died, they were “denied entrance to the graveside funeral by an armed security guard,” being informed that they were not on the list.”

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Looking for something to do the first weekend in May? Wanna get your groove on in the City Of Brotherly Love? Hungry for a few days of homosexuality, history, hunky anchormen (left) and some hasidic jews?

Presenting then, this year’s star-studded and cock-ringed Equality Forum!

Equality Forum is a national and international LGBT civil rights organization with an educational focus. Equality Forum coordinates LGBT History Month, produces documentary films, undertakes high-impact initiatives and presents the premier annual national and international LGBT civil rights summit.   Every year this glam-fest features a big high-profile “featured nation” to really spice up the drama! This year, Israel!

“Equality Forum 2012, our 20^th anniversary celebrates the transformation from a groundbreaking conference that focused on an emerging civil rights movement into the annual Equality Forum recognized as the premier annual national and international LGBT summit,” stated Malcolm Lazin, Executive Director. “Israel as the featured nation will be represented by the Ambassador to the U.S., major Israeli LGBT leaders, and Tel Aviv DJs and entertainers.”

The annual shindig includes 25 panels (BORING!), International Equality Dinner (only exciting during the cocktail hour and great blowjobs in the bathroom during the speeches), SundayOUT! at The Piazza (super fun), six parties (last year, BAD!), 13^th Annual Gay and Lesbian Art Exhibit (think tacky!), theater, and special events.

But, there is going to be a bevy of beautiful big names for you star-fuckers to drool over too:

• Ambassador of Israel to the U.S. Dr. Michael B. Oren
• Israeli photographer David Adika
• Tel Aviv Drag Queen Osher Sabag (Seriously?)
• Israeli Pop Star Shorty (WHO?)
• Houston Mayor Annise Parker
• MSNBC Anchor Thomas Roberts (HUNKY! PICTURED!)

So, if your like me – and love the Jews!  I mean, LOVE the Jews…Then join me in Philly this May!

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Over this weekend, infamous and unstoppable party promoter John Blair crawled out of obscurity and opened up a new club: XL.  IN NEW YORK! A brand-new, farm-fresh, ready for your steady, club.  A big, old-school, C-L-U-B.

See kids, back in the OLDEN DAYS, clubs were much different animals then the shit we got going now. The joints that call themselves clubs? Not so much.  No New Yorkers, Eastern Bloc is NOT a club. Yes New Yorkers, Splash is (sadly) a club. Clubs are big, have multiple bars, a huge dance floor (or two), drug dealers by the dozen, and plenty of shit going on at every turn.  Hot shit. Dirty shit. Nasty shit.

When I was a naive and handsome little queer, I used to shake my pussy at clubs like Club USA (legendary!), the Palladium (Club MTV was filmed there!) Limelight (See the movie Party Monster for the details) Twilo (the tippy-tippy-top) Sound Factory (meh) and Crobar NY (cheese-EEEEEE).

These were clubs.

They were so big you could actually sneak a smoke inside without people knowing. Oh who am I kidding, I don’t smoke. I meant bump. BUMP.  God, those were the good old days.

Now, when I need to dance in NY, I’m stuck going to these tiny little crack-dens. Places where I am fighting for floor space with some urban hipster and fat drag queen.  No thanks.

Alright, enough about the history of glamourous nightlife.  This weekend, they opened a gigantic new gay club in NYC. It is the first large club opening in a long time, and damn sure the first big old gay club in COMPLETELY gay club in even longer.  The space is all decked out with the latest gadgety stuff in lights, sound systems, and other fancy-schmancy stuff. Even with all that stuff, the joint does feel like its from a low-gone era. It is totally retro.  It does feel dated.  Yes, its kinda tacky. No, scratch that… It is TACKY.  Super tacky.

But who cares? I don’t give a shit.  Do I agree with all the reviews? Yup. You want to know what this hoe-down is like? Read HERE.  It’s probably the best description of the joint I have read. Dead on.

But all this bitching and blabbing is completely missing the boat. Who fucking cares if this new club looks like the after-birth from Studio 54′s botched abortion. (And I mean the movie, not even the club…) Who cares!  We got a new club, dickbags! Celebrate it!

The economy has been in the crapper for so long, so very very long.  Clubs are not the world’s greatest investments either. (Unless your skimming, wink-wink.) So banks and money-barons have not been handing out the loot to people who want to open big dance joints. Especially if they are gay!

I think everyone needs to shut=the-fuck-up about the decor, the music, the lines…Whatever…Just suck it up. The club doesn’t have to be the one for YOU. It might not appeal to your karma every night, and maybe not any night. But all of us gays should get down on our hands and knees and thank the Disco Gods for sending us something!   ‘Cause you know, if this one is popular – their will be more following it!

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Do you read The Advocate?

The long-beloved gay rag is always on the cutting edge of homo journalism, sassy celebrity dish, and tawdry and trashy lil tales.  I suppose it also has a bit of political intrigue and social stories – but as a self-centered sex addict, I don’t bother to read THOSE articles.

The latest issue has a juicy little story.  Seems that the Advocate’s star muck-raer, Brandon Voss (formerly of HX) has found another target for his gay exposee.

Voss, clearly diving past the PR bitch,  asks Nick Jonas if he’s a big homo!

No lie!

Well, he didn’t put it exactly LIKE that, but I can read the subtext. Jonas claims he is not a butt pirate, though:

“The amazing thing about our fans is that they’re incredibly supportive about everything that we do, but I have to separate us from the equation because the three of us aren’t gay. If someone in our position came out, I’d hope that support would carry over and that their fans would love them just the same.”

Isn’t that sweet?  Nick just loves the homos!  Just like Jesus! Seriously:

“My upbringing was faith-based, but we believed you should love all others as you want to be loved, because everyone should be treated equally. That’s helped me have an understanding of people on different journeys and in different walks of life. At the end of the day, we’re all the same, because we all want to be loved.”

Then Nick begins to open up about his feelings on gay getting hitched:

My thoughts on gay marriage are that everyone has the right to love and be loved, and that’s the position I take.

Did you also know, that Jonas he has a TON of gay friends! He’s a regular fag stag! (Do people still use that phrase? Never took, did it?)  Jonas should have some queer chums, he’s been working for Disney (GAY!) for years and is now dancing with the queens on Broadway in “How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying.” In fact, the gays are Nick’s FAVORITE fans:

“My brothers and I totally look forward to meeting them, because they really respond to our style, and it’s cool to see how our influence has impacted what they’re wearing. They also give really good gifts at our meet-and-greets — hats, scarves, and other things. They always have good taste.”

Channing Tatum.

Channing Tatum, Channing Tatum, Channing Tatum.

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My God.

OMG

Sweet Lord, Channing Tatum, you are smoking hot.

And you are EVERYWHERE lately.

Your career is on fire my fine fine friend, and thank heavens for that!

Onboard for 2012, you’ve got  Haywire, The Vow and the  21 Jump Street remake! Yes, I said a remake of 21 Jump Street!  (I can hear that classic theme song by Holly Robinson in my head!)
And don’t forget the sequel-licious   G.I. Joe: Retaliation. Damn the first G.I. Joe sucked balls, but watch it with the sound off and just stare at Channing.  I give it two thumbs (and my erect cocklet) up!

In other Channing silver screen news – my favorite magazine ever – Entertainment Weekly got me all hot-n-bothered over: Magic Mike.  Magic Mike is an upcoming drama film directed by Steven Soderbergh. staring a whole lot of naked boy flesh! (Check out that pic…Growl!)

Synopsis: Veteran male stripper Magic Mike (Tatum) teaches a new male stripper (twinky Alex Pettyfer) how to shake it and rake it in. They get jiggling at  Xquisite (AMAZING name…), which is owned by the former male stripper Dallas (Matthew “Bongo” McConaughey).

ISN”T THAT THE FUCKING HOTTEST THING YOU HAVE EVER HEARD OF?

So in 2012, won’t you join me at the Cineplex?  I’ll spring for popcorn!

Tom Goss, a handsome, gay singer-songwriter who is always in heavy rotation on my iPod.

Having basically raised myself, I respect a good-looking self-made man. Goss is a self-promoted and self-distributed artist, who’s first album, “Naked Without,” was music to my ears.  Plus, it came with a provocative but tasteful image of him in the nude!  Talk about knowing your market!

Goss will blow you away with songs like  “Lover” (the video features a wounded gay soldier dying in combat while his male life partner waits for his back home) and “Turn It Around” one of the tracks on his third full-length album where he sings about Mike, his husband in real life.

Goss, “the accidental activist,” a current resident of Washington, D. C., whose outspokenness on deeply important themes is “almost entirely due to circumstances rather than design.”

He explains: “I’ve always been interested in social justice. I was training to become a priest, and I wanted to do a lot of social justice work and reconciliation stuff. But since I’ve been doing music and in the midst of the LGBT community in that regard. I’ve done a couple of different projects.”

Most his songs reflect his own place in time and space, like “Til the End.”  Released in 2009 on his “Back to Love” album,  which many of his fans felt was a highly charged and socially conscious album – even political.

“Honestly . . . it wasn’t political . . . More than anything, I started writing about love. I married my husband . . . and it’s been amazing, healing, empowering, strengthening, and everything you want it to be.”

Other popular songs like “Who We Are” and “The Politics of Love,” but he primarily wails about love. “I mean, when you think about love, do you think about a male physique? No, you think about beauty. You think about tenderness, you think about compassionate-you think about warmth.“

Attention Homosexuals!  here is the direct scoop on the upcoming election: If you’re a gay American, don’t vote for Newt Gingrich.

And guess what, that’s not a Democratic talking point — that’s reportedly what Newt himself said on Tuesday to a gay man in Iowa.

“I asked him if he’s elected, how does he plan to engage gay Americans. How are we to support him?” Scott Arnold, an associate professor of writing at William Penn University, told the Des Moines Register. “And he told me to support Obama.”

Newt (who has a lesbian half-sister who is also an Obama supporter), has come out for a constitutional amendment prohibiting same-sex marriage, which he has called a “temporary aberration that will dissipate.”  So…Yeah…Clearly he ain’t looking for any gay support – but thank God we have confirmation!

Like many other hate-mongers, Newt’s campaign relies heavily on evangelical voters (RE: CRAZY BIBLE BEATERS) who do not trust Mitt Romney. Anywho…. It’s not standard campaign politics to tell someone you don’t want their vote.  Even if you do plan on completely screwing them once you get elected, it is just not typical of a candidate.

“You expect them to support all Americans and have everyone’s general interest,” Arnold told the register. “It’s a little bit frustrating and disheartening when you’re told to support the other side. That he doesn’t need your support.”

Meanwhile, Newt might want to rethink his strategy.  America is getting gayer and gayer!  (I blame Glee)  Check-out this interesting article on how 48 of our States have openly-OUT elected officials!  (And that is not counting the dozens of deeply closeted Republicans….)

I love Zac Efron.

Have you seen this pic? I swear it rolled through my Facebook newsfeed like a bazillion times.  And each time, I giggled and felt that tingling in my pee-pee.  (You know, like when you are riding on the Pirate Ship at 6 Flags? You know what I am talking about!)

I don’t know if this t-shirt pic is fake or real. It looks like it could have been photo-shopped. It looks a little CGI to my eyes.

But, I love the IDEA that it is real. I don’t even need for Zac to be gay.  In fact, I’d probably not love him as much if he was a homo. I just want Zac to like me.

Zac has been dogged by gay rumors since he first started shakin’ his money-maker for the Disney audience.  Perez Hilton has practically made it a 40 hour a week job to out Zac, or as he calls him – Zacquisha.  Many celebrities would throw themselves into the mouth of testosterone to avoid even the hint of gay scandal.

Zac is also so happily assured of his sexuality, that he doesn’t have any problem hanging out with gays at the gay clubs.  He has been seen at LA’s famous gay hot-spot The Abbey.  I’ve hung out at that dump, and I can tell you – I’d have lost my SHIT if I bumped into Zac there. LOST IT.

Hulk Hogan is not gay, folks. Don’t let the tight spandex or feathered boas fool you.  He has dismissed his ex-wife’s claims that he is gay as “insane” and says he would accept his sexuality if he was gay.

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The wrestler, film star, and fashion icon -  whose real name is Terry Bollea – has filed a defamation lawsuit against Linda Bollea, his wife for 24 years, after she accused him of domestic violence and a gay affair with fellow wrestler Brutus Beefcake.  Frankly, I never saw the Hulkster as GAY, but Brutus – totally.  She screamed queen. I never got gay from the Hulkster. Nope.  I mean, sure, that mustache is total ’70′s porn – but it is NOT necessarily gay.

Hogan, 58, told US Weekly: “After the four-year crazy divorce I thought I’d heard everything I could hear in the courtroom. Then, all of a sudden she says I abused her, that I was violent. She told everybody that I was a homosexual. If any of that was true, I would admit it, and [if] I was a homosexual I would embrace it. It’s just so crazy to hear, so I have a real problem with it.  If you’re going to say I’m something that I’m not to try to ruin my career and my livelihood… I have to answer her back. It’s so ridiculous. I don’t mean to laugh about it, because it’s not funny. But it’s insane. It doesn’t make any sense to me.”

I love that the Hulkster would “embrace” homosexuality.  I picture him diving into a big pile of sweaty men folk! Just sucking and fucking and licking and rimming and humping and bumping!

In the ex-Mrs. Hulk’s memoir, Wrestling the Hulk: My Life Against the Ropes, the lady claims she was the victim of physical, mental and emotional abuse during her marriage!  The trifecta!

“Hulk tore my clothes, threw lamps, and held me down on the bed with his hands around my throat during arguments,” Ms Bollea wrote. “I was always afraid he would kill me in one of his rages.”

The pair, who divorced in 2009, have a daughter  Brooke and son Nick (aka Hulk Jr.) together.