Loud and Queer

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How easily are you defined?

Do you fit into a simple box?

Are you a cookie-cutter kind of fellow? Easily charted, mapped, and monitored. Are you predictable and staid?

Or are you unique? Mysterious? Spontaneous? Undetermined?

Is your sexuality black or white?  Not skin color, and not vanilla or kink – but are you the kind of guy who is just into guys? Or do you sometimes take a dip into the “lady-pond”.

Unsurprisingly, more and more boys are keeping their sexuality fluid. Bisexuals are on the rise – the next big generation of power-studs. “Why limit ourselves?” the kids cry! Why indeed.

We’ve even seen it here! Here on GAY Live Network! Have you noticed it? On our phone lines, more and more gentleman callers are identifying as STRAIGHT or BI! We know girl, we know! Honey, we listen to every one of those queeny cackles or husky voices. The numbers – and network – speaks for itself.  People want pussy and penis. Period!

So, to meet this demand – the tech-boys (and girls!) here at GLN have given all our users a new option.  First – before people flip out of their chair – let’s make sure you understand the definition of OPTION:

1. The act of choosing; choice. See Synonyms at choice.

2. The power or freedom to choose.

3. Something chosen or available as a choice.

4. An item or feature that may be chosen to replace or enhance another.

So, starting THIS WEEK, subscribers to Gay Live Network will now have the option of listening to – and having their profile listened to – by WOMEN.  GASP!  Yes, the OPTION.   This means that:

It will not be automatic.                      You don’t have to do it.

You won’t be forced to.                        It’s a choice you can make or ignore.

Don’t get your panties in a bunch boys. You are still going to be able to have all the cock-gabbling dirty boy, naughty twink, hot daddy, beefy bear, sex-sex-sex you want – SANS WOMEN.  But, in case you want to add that element into your stew, you can.

Its very Burger King…Have it your way.  (And – I guess – Home of the Whopper! The metaphor works on so many levels.)

Catch you on the phone lines!

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Last year, Archie Comics made news when it introduced Kevin Keller, the first openly gay character in Archie’s hometown of Riverdale. Regular readers of this blog know I have been covering this story RELENTLESSLY! (Here & Here) In this breaking news: Now, there’s more history being made: Keller will get married in a January 2012 issue. TO A DUDE!

Fox News reports – in a piece called “Archie Comics Announces Gay Character Will Marry, Will Anyone Object?” – a senior fellow at the Family Research Council said this: “It’s unfortunate that a comic book series usually seen as depicting innocent, all-American life is now being used to advance the sexual revolution.”

Oh shut up hater!

The adult version of Kevin Keller is set to appear in Life With Archie #16, the magazine-format series that depicts, in each issue, the experiences of a 20-something Archie married to Betty in one possible future, and another where he’s married to Veronica. The comic is set to depict Keller as returning to Riverdale as a war hero, and marrying his “Mr. Right.”

Kevin Keller debuted a year ago in the pages of Veronica #202 to plenty of positive press, and has since gone on to star in his own miniseries, with an ongoing announced for February 2012. In the miniseries, it was revealed that Kevin is an Army brat, with plans on following in his father’s footsteps.

Archie’s official press release follows:

KEVIN KELLER GETS MARRIED!

New York, NY (September 14, 2011) The amazingly popular Kevin Keller is featured in the twenty-something world of Life With Archie. Kevin followed in his father’s foot steps and is returning to Riverdale as a war hero, but that’s not all – It’s Kevin’s wedding day! The whole gang turns out for Kevin Keller’s wedding as we discover how Kevin met “Mr. Right.” It’s not all hearts and flowers, however. Unfortunately, this all occurs during the separation of Archie and Veronica. Archie Comics presents the wedding event of the year … again!

When Keller’s character was announced in April 2010, Archie Comics co-CEO John Goldwater said,

“The introduction of Kevin is just about keeping the world of Archie Comics current and inclusive. Archie’s hometown of Riverdale has always been a safe world for everyone. It just makes sense to have an openly gay character in Archie comic books.”

Check out my latest celebrity crush…Thomas Dekker!

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Isn’t he MARVY?  I adore him.  Most of you will recognize his handsome mug from his roles as John Connor in Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles and Zach on Heroes. But now, Dekker is slicking up the sliver screen! This rising indie film star, musician, and general hottie is delightfully queer-friendly.  In face, he recently told Advocate.com and other media outlets that he wouldn’t rule the possibility of having sexual relationships with men if the occasion would “come-up.” Good God Thomas, we applaud you for your honesty – but you are going to be fending off desperate queens from here to Altoona now! Everyone is going to want to take a shot at you!

A few weeks later, the editors of Interview (April 2011) caught up with him to discuss his “almost two decades building fascinatingly varied body of work.” The prolific, multi-talented actor is turning director his first feature film, “The Wall of Fame,” produced by fabulous lesbian producer, Christine Vachon. Alternative actors, much like Dekker himself, Nico Tortorella and Shiloh Fernandez head the cast and much of the primary shooting has been finished. Look for me to be the first in line for this flick!

Dekker began his career by pushing Huggies Pull-Ups in television commercials at the age of 5. By 6 he’s graduated to the big screen, landing a part in John Carpenter’s “Village of the Damned” (1995), remember that piece-of-shit?  (Stinking pile of crap, and boy did if ever make me hate blonde kids.) A later career highlight includes playing Satan in “Touched by an Angel.” “I got to throw Roma Downey down the stairs and then I turned into a lion.”

Dekker really bounced onto the gay radar when his last year’s role in queer renegade director Gregg Araki‘s “Kaboom,” lead Dekker to be part of the first-ever Queer Palm Award at Cannes. He followed that with a star-making turn as queer Lance Loud in HBO’s “Cinema Verite,” a film about “An American Family,” the PBS series of 1973 considered to be the first Reality TV show.

For all this, and more, I am making Dekker my new IT Boy!  What do you think?

How are you celebrating the holidays?

Cuddled up under the tree, unwrapping gifts with that special someone? Spreading your legs wide and making snow angels with a cute elf?  Or, are you going to be sitting alone in your jammies watching TV and stuffing your fat mouth with Christmas cookies?  Even if you are a swinging single, or headed out of town, you still won’t have any problem finding three (or more…) wise men!

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Our frisky little friends at the Gay Live Network want to help you have a ho-ho-ho-ish holiday.  They’ve come up with an amazing offer that is sure to stuff your stocking. Every new member gets 50% off the normal rate! Basically, they get 3 days for $4.99! Did you just fall out of your chair? I know I did! You can’t buy smokes for $4.99!

This promo starts TODAY and runs until 1/3.

So dive in my little reindeer!  Find a stud and take him under the mistletoe!

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Attention sporty gays, we have something for you! A few posts back we gave you a gay giftbag idea for the gay fanboys you might know.  Now, its time for those super-masculine, ultra macho softball players!

A few of the teams from the Greater Los Angeles Softball Association have rounded up their hottest players for a 2011 calendar, with all proceeds going to benefit the teams and the AIDS Project Los Angeles Necessities of Life program.

The teams are engaged in a competition to see who can sell their boy pussies the most copies.  Since I only drop by LA to hit the Abbey and get some botox, I could honestly give a crap who is on what team.

But at the end of the day, all money raised goes to benefit a worthy cause – and gives me plenty of eye candy. I’m giving all my female cousin’s on my step-mom’s side one of these! Aunt Ginny is going to cream her mom jeans!

Click here to order a copy.

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Many of you regular readers know that while I might be a super-fabulous, on-the-go-go-go gay; I’m also a bit of a geek. I like video games, sci-fi, comic books, horror movies - all that good stuff.  And as much as I like geeky stuff, I love boys who love geeky stuff even more! Geek chic!

As more of us gays come out of the closet everyday, more gay geeks join the ranks of the queer cartel!  And don’t buy the old stereotypes, these geeks are yummy-yummy hunks.  To prove it, I’ve picked the 2011 Fanboy of the Universe Calendar as today’s Gay Gift Bag!

For the low-low-low price of only $14.95 you get an entire year’s worth of Fanboys! (Go here to buy, and get it shipped to you before the holidays!) These tasty little nerds will arrive at ready to brighten up your house, apartment, dorm room or military base! The official 2011 Fanboy of the Month Calendar is now available for pre-order, and features Sam, Moses, Rafael, Trevor, Ben and many more!

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I am not ALWAYS a huge fan of boys wearing Speedos, or any kind of banana-hammock. Too often, they just don’t have the body for it. I think if you are going to wear a skimpy bathing suit - you should have to have a fully body-fat, body-hair, and penis analysis before you are allowed to strut it on the beach. I’m just saying.

Now, I fully support ANY swimming professional in a skimpy. THONGS for all of them! Swimmers have the hottest little hairless bodies, with rippling muscles and that faint scent of chlorine.  Ahhhhhh…..When it comes to sports, if I can’t have a soccer player, I’ll be a whore for  pool boy.  Lordy…

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Ever since I penned the previous about hunky soccer player Gomez, I’ve found myself researching oggling all kinds of hot footballers.

I am head-over-heels in love with Portuguese-born, Spanish-team playing, soccer player Cristiano Ronaldo.

The sexy 25-year-old has been contracted by world-famous Italian fashion designer Giorgio Armani.  Ronaldo will be featured in a massive ad campaign modeling everything from Armani, from men’s underwear to jeans. The ad campaign was just launched with a smiling, shirtless Ronaldo in a two-page spread wearing nothing but his Armani jeans (above).  Exquisite

This Armani campaign is part of a major trend in the fashion industry to elicit international sports superstars to endorsement of men’s fashions, fragrances and accessories. (Plus: Ronaldo’s image as an international playboy also fits the bill for a fashion house like Armani’s.)

As the editors of Vanity Fair (June, 2010) wrote of Ronaldo” “Portugal’s favorite son is a throwback to the unself-conscious swingers who lit up the football world in the 60s and 70s.”

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Queer web site founder Nathan Manske strongly believes in the words of writer C. S. Lewis “We read to know we’re not alone.”

The Driftwood, Texas native (now another damn hipster in Brooklyn) “was sensitized to the facts that gays and lesbians [were] requiring support far outside of places where they might see a rainbow flag in a storefront.”  Manske set out to create his blog, ImFromDriftwood.com, to tell “personal narratives” rather than the typical “coming out” stories.

Manske wants readers and writers to share comic, dramatic and romantic experiences about their sexual identity, reflecting the complete spectrum and diversity of the LGBTQ community across  the world. After all, coming-out stories are as unique and different as the gays who have them…And Manske believes that in each, are bits of joy, sorrow, glee, and a little bit of of common ground.

Besides the written accounts, Manske is currently expanding the web site to accept video interviews and podcasts.  Manske and Marquise Lee, a video director, have been traveling across country, including Alaska and Hawaii, collecting personal stories, visiting LGBTQ community centers and college campuses, and posting episodes of their journey as video blog entries.

“If someone could have gone back in time to tell me where the site is now, I’d be ecstatic,” he admitted of what he started only in 2009, “The appeal of telling a story is there’s no interruption, no debate-you just get to tell it as your own.”

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Last night just might have been the gayest night on television. Let’s break it down.

First up, Glee blew the roof off their stellar record of homo-friendly fun with the introduction of Blaine, who sings with a rival glee-ers the Dalton Academy Warblers, played by my future husband Darren Criss.

We first reported that new guy Chord Overstreet was going to play Kurt Hummel’s (Chris Colfer) much anticipated love interest, but he’s been snogging Quinn for weeks.  Which is fine. I am in love with this kid. Check out his all-boys academy version of Katy Perry’s Teenage Dreams - and tell me you don’t fall right into boner-time.

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Before joining the cast of Glee, Criss was on the shortlived show Eastwick, which nobody ever saw…

Criss is best known as playing the title role in the very viral and very hysterical  A Very Potter Musical (and A Very Potter Sequel). Both, Harry Potter spoofs by the U of Michigan theater group StarKid went viral last year, launching curly cutie here into web celeb status and kick-starting his career as a singer-songwriter.

I won’t go into too many details about the rest of the rampant same-sex lovefest that was Glee last night, but to say if you have NOT seen it – Hulu that shit NOW!  NOW! Now! Now! Now!

Later, the cherry on my HD TV sundae, The Fashion Show rolled out it’s second season! They dumped Kelly Rowland to up the diva factor with IMAN! IMAN!  David Bowie’s fierce super-model super-wife!  Style icon IMAN!

Fashion Show stunk last season – but this season with the introduction of IMAN (you must all-caps it!) and her wacky-haughy-weird accent and diva behavior, I am going to be hooked like heroin! I love how every critique IMAN offers the designers is yelled…She is glamorously bellowing at the crappy designers.  I love it!

So, if you missed last night, then you were absent for the greatest night for gay men since the birth of Jeffrey Sanker.  Don’t be at the gym or the bathhouse next week when Tuesday Night TV skips into your home!