Loud and Queer

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I wonder exactly how many pairs of Calvin Klein’s tighty whities I have been worn in my long gay life.  How many I’ve lost. how many I’ve soiled.  How many I’ve stuffed in a trick’s mouth to keep him from waking up my neighbors.

All gay men owe Calvin Klein an immense debt of gratitude. Which is why, I am (barely) tolerating the fact that this legendary fashion designer and icon has basically stolen my husband. Nick Gruber (on the right, baby!), the fashion mogul’s current boyfriend is barely 21-years-old, a native blond Floridian, a semi-pro mixed martial arts fighter, and PORN STAR!

Gruber, befriended by gay model/pornographer Blue Blake, has so far only a brief stint in the adult entertainment industry under the alias Aaron Skyline. He appeared in “Next Door Male“, playing opposite gay superstar Mason Wyler, and  in solo scenes on SeanCody.com where Gruber’s name is “Zeke.”

Rumors are that Klein discovered his boyfriend online. (Grindr is God!) But last fall the 69-year-old Klein told an audience at the 92th Street Y: “I fell in love with a wonderful young man, and we recently went paragliding off Aspen Mountain.”

Current rumors, according to the New York Daily News (January 12, 2012) are that the two love birds – who earlier vowed to “live together forever” – have reportedly split up. Village Voice queer columnist Michael Musto slapped Klein’s hand last week when he wrote: “Calvin, darling, you’re embarrassing yourself. What’s worse, you’re embarrassing the whole community.”

Oh, Michael Musto! Don’t be a hideous old troll. Let people LOVE! Love, is, well…LOVE!

I met Musto once in Manhattan. I was so excited, I’d always been such a big fan. So I sauntered up and introduced myself.  He meekly shook my hand, stared at me for a few minutes as I babbled, and slinked away.  Very shy man.  Very shy.  W

Congrats on getting that young dick Calvin! You go for it!  I hope I’m bagging hot pieces of tail when I’m in my 70′s!